I feel like sometimes you put your talent in a freezer. You limit it, you seal it in a bag with zips and coverings. You don't expect much of it. The opposite can be true. A person can expect talent to take them to the end of the world. They also wish the world of their talent. As if the talent can be this incredible offering. Their salvation that can be withdrawn indefinitely. Its not really true, talent much be refreshed. A person's life much be diverse and simple. Its not all about desire, much of it is about willingness and dedication.

It can be a tramatic process though; this coninual freezing and thawing.

I remain hopeful that I can go without the cold and the preservation methods society has carved out. It happens to be a path, we choose to follow it, but it also is much advertised and much followed.

I believe, in hope. My mind parellels that of a healing scar, the process will be recorded- I will not forget the pain, but the future is sealed in layers of skin. It is protected, or coloured in a direction that allows me to continue on, to take the next step.

My emotional self has gone through the same burdening, but in a different way. My experiences with love have equally taxed, and fulfilled- changed and inspired me. Neither good nor bad, but directive like a god; a belief that the the will be better the "there" will be here. All this exists without reflection. Much of the discipline is over before I know it, fallen through the holes of the metal confines, the grated, rocked surfaces that displace other importance. A fufilled mind is one that can recognize itself.

Awareness.

Balance.

Hope.